


Alec, The Movie Director

by katychan666



Series: The drunk adventures of Malec [6]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Annoyed!Underhill, M/M, amused!magnus, crackfic, drunk!Alec
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-07
Updated: 2018-07-07
Packaged: 2019-06-06 16:32:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15198839
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katychan666/pseuds/katychan666
Summary: Alec and Underhill are enjoying an evening out. Alec gets hammered and Underhill sees that his mouth is pretty dangerous, so he decides to take Alec back home to Magnus, where Alec starts making a plan about a movie, he'll direct. A love story about an Angel and the Prince of hell. Underhill's going to write the script for the movie, while Alec is already working hard on casting the right people XD.(Idk, things get crazy you guys XD)





	Alec, The Movie Director

''Did I tell you how great my boyfriend is?'' asked Alec for what felt like the hundredth time and Underhill grinned, shaking his head. He had been out drinking with his friend and while Alec decided to get hammered, Underhill was the responsible adult and decided to only have a few drinks, not allowing to get the alcohol to him. Someone needed to get Alec back home safely to his better half and he gulped down the rest of his beer as he looked to his right, Alec laying on the bar and was muttering something to himself, something that Underhill couldn't really make out what it meant, but it had to be about the warlock, because his friend had that kind of a smile on his face only when he would talk about his boyfriend.

“You’ve mentioned a few times, yes,” said Underhill and Alec slowly lifted himself up, the room spinning and he felt his stomach making a flop. He leaned back and if Underhill wouldn’t place a hand on his back to keep him in place, he would end up falling on the floor, right on his ass. Painful and hard. Alec hiccupped and a drunken smile spread across his face as he waggled his eyebrows. “I think you’ve had enough alcohol for one day, big guy,” he then said and when he attempted to take away the glass from Alec, the younger one was closer and he quickly snatched the glass away.

“ _Mine_ ,” said Alec, possessively and he then looked at Underhill’s glass, which was now empty and he quite quickly came to the conclusion why his friend was after his drink. “Oh, no, where did your beer go, Theo?” asked Alec and started looking around. “All gone already?” he asked and then shook his head. “No, no, no... We can’t have that. Maia, bring my friend here another-”

“That won’t be necessary, thank you, Maia,” said Underhill when Maia stepped closer to them and gave them a polite smile. She would love to stay around and chat, but she was already needed at another table and she quickly excused herself and then Underhill and Alec were left alone again, Underhill trying to think of a way to convince his boss that he had enough fun for the day. It was probably the time to get going back to Magnus’ loft, but he knew that Alec wouldn’t share his opinion as he was still very much for partying.

“You’re such a party pooper,” said Alec and then pulled out his phone and his smile spread across his face when he saw his background. It was a picture of Magnus he took one day when he wasn’t looking. He was absolutely stunning on the photo and he slowly brought his phone in front of Underhill’s face and he pointed. “See, this is called perfection,” said Alec and waggled his eyebrows. “Have you ever seen a more perfect person than Magnus?” asked Alec and Underhill was tempted to say yes, that it was his boyfriend that was in his eyes more perfect than Magnus, but he held that back, because he really wasn’t in the mood for this again and he chuckled.

“We all get it, Magnus Bane is a catch,” said Underhill and Alec nodded.

“I know right?” asked Alec, his speech slurred and he then hummed. “His warlock mark is so beautiful. He has a gorgeous pair of cat eyes,” said Alec and Underhill nodded. Yes, he knew that. Just before, Alec had made a whole hour speech about why Magnus’ eyes were perfect and he grinned when Alec went on with the list of the things that he admired about Magnus. “And-and his hair, it’s always so… wow. You know what I mean?” asked Alec and grinned. “And his make up, Theo… his _make up._ His eyes are always _glowing._ Sparky, sparkly,” said Alec and Underhill nodded again as he was only listening at this point. Alec didn’t allow him the time to reply to him and Alec then started thinking. “I’ll call Magnus to tell him how perfect he is,” said Alec, thinking it was a good idea, but Underhill quickly took the phone from him. “Hey!”

“Nope,” said Underhill. “Magnus will kill me if he figures out just how hammered you are at the moment,” he said and Alec pouted and rested his chin on top of the bar, opening and closing his mouth, looking up at the lights and he giggled when he saw the shimmering lights shifting colours on the ceiling and Underhill arched his eyebrow. Now what?

“Look, Theo… the lights look just like Magnus’ eyes. So pretty and sparkly,” said Alec and Underhill started laughing. This was getting hilarious; everytime he and Alec would go out drinking, in his drunken state, Alec would always only talk about Magnus. And if they went somewhere, he’d always bring Magnus up into the conversation. It didn’t matter really, but every time they would hang out, Alec always made it about Magnus and in a way, it was kind of adorable to Underhill, because his friend was so utterly and completely smitten with the warlock.

“Yeah, yeah,” said Underhill and Alec leaned back, lifted his arms up high into the air and cheered loudly. Underhill started looking around when he saw that people were looking to their way and before Alec could get even louder, he placed a hand on top of Alec’s mouth and quieted down his drunk friend, who gave him an annoyed look and he crossed his arms on top of his chest. What was he, five? Drunk Alec had the mentality that of a five year old child and just as Underhill was tempted to say something, Alec had already moved on and was talking about some other things.

“Did I tell you that Magnus and I had our first date here?” asked Alec.

“Yes, multiple times already,” said Underhill and shook his head.

“Oh,” said Alec. “Did I tell you that I was the first one to say ‘I love you’,” said Alec proudly and Underhill rolled his eyes. Yes, he _knew_ that. It was the tale old as time basically at this point. Everyone _knew_ all of the details about their relationship.

“Yes.”

“Did I tell you that this Head of the Institute is very talented at giving head?” asked Alec then Underhill’s eyes went huge as he looked over at his friend and his jaw dropped then. Okay, was Alec really just…? Even though Alec had gotten hammered with him a few times, Alec _never_ talked about intimate things. Such as sex. Never and Underhill was pretty reserved guy as well, so he was _shocked_ when he heard Alec saying that so casually.

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me,” said Alec proudly and hit the bar with his fist. “I’m _so_ talented, Magnus says,” said Alec and his eyes were shining with happiness. There was Magnus again and Underhill had to laugh, but his laughter soon died out as Alec opened his mouth to share more. Sharing was caring in Alec’s opinion. “I’m a natural,” he then added and waggled his eyebrows. “No gag reflex here,” he said and pointed to himself. “I’ve mastered the art so sucking-”

“Alec, please shut the hell up,” hissed Underhill, because they were getting strange stares from people next to them and Alec shrugged. He didn’t know what he said wrong, it was the truth. Maybe Underhill was just uptight because he wasn’t as talented at him?

“Lacking talent yourself, my friend?” asked Alec and Underhill gave him an offended look.

“No, I’m great at it. Trevor never complains when I-” he started, but then bit his tongue and he rolled his eyes. Nope, he wasn’t going to let Alec get to him. Besides, Alec was just drunk that was all and he took in a deep breath and Alec started laughing and Underhill had to hold him in place or he’d end up falling.

“Good then,” said Alec happily and then leaned up against the bar again for support and then sighed happily. “If not, I can always give you some tips,” said Alec happily and Underhill narrowed his eyes, sighing. “Because it took me a while to master the ways of deep throating and-”

“By the Angel, Alec… shut up!” hissed Underhill and went red in the face, Alec having far too much fun and he kept laughing like a madman when he saw just how embarrassed his friend look like.

“What’s your favourite position?” went on by asking Alec, not having a filter at all and that was the last straw for Underhill. He quickly paid for their drinks, then grabbed Alec by his wrist and started dragging him out of the Hunter’s Moon and the drunk Shadowhunter just kept laughing and laughing. Probably the whole New York was able to hear him and Underhill just wanted to get his friend hope. Alec was one of his best friends, but currently he just couldn’t deal with him and just needed to get him home, before he would end up as a laughing stock of the Shadow world.

“What’s your problem?” whined Alec as Underhill kept dragging him and then something caught his attention. “Oh, this was the place where I ended up puking when I went out drinking with Magnus one day,” said Alec and pointed to the corner, Underhill shaking his head and Alec then continued walking, pointing to a few meters forward. “That was where Magnus helped me stand up because I fell on the floor,” said Alec and then pointed to the street sign. “And this… this is Steve,” said Alec and pointed to the pole, walking to it, almost tripping over his feet and then spun around the sign, waggling his eyebrows. “I gave Magnus a pole dance here once,” said Alec and Underhill narrowed his eyes.

“You for real?”

“Yeah,” said Alec.

“Were you by any chance sober?”

“No,” said Alec and then waddled over to Underhill and dragged him forward, pointing to an alley. “But Magnus liked the show I gave him, because he fucked me right against this wall,” said Alec and Underhill’s jaw dropped. “Ever done it in public?”

“For the love of God, Alec,” said Underhill and started laughing.

“What? You and your boyfriend should try it out sometime,” said Alec. “It’s fun and exciting,” said Alec and waggled his eyebrows.

“Yeah. Okay, I think it’s time to get you back home,” said Underhill.

“Probably. I miss Magnus already,” said Alec stubbornly and Underhill rolled his eyes. Alec couldn’t go on without Magnus for a few hours. Then again, it wasn’t like he was any better as he found himself missing his own boyfriend as well and they slowly made their way back up to Magnus’ loft, Underhill knocking on the door, while Alec was leaning against the wall and was singing to himself a random song, Magnus narrowing his eyes when he opened the door and sighed when he saw the state of his boyfriend and Underhill quickly handed Alec to him.

“Here you go,” said Underhill quickly and Magnus wrapped an arm around Alec, pulling him up and then looked at Underhill. “Honestly, it’s easier to take care of a child than to be taking care of him when he’s drunk,” said Alec and rolled his eyes. “I have a headache thanks to your boyfriend,” said Underhill and Alec perked up when he heard the word _head._

“I am talented at giving head,” said Alec loudly, announcing it to the entire building loud and proud and even Magnus was shocked by this as his jaw dropped and he then looked at Underhill, who was massaging his temples and was sighing. “I, Alec Lightwood… the Head of the New York Instititue have mastered the ways of deep-”

“Magnus, make him shut up,” hissed Underhill.

“Why?” asked Magnus innocently, because he was _amused_. Oh, this was so much fun and he then pressed a kiss against his boyfriend’s cheek. “And it’s the truth. The truth can never be silences, isn’t that right, Angel?” asked Magnus and Alec drunkenly giggled.

“He called me an Angel,” said Alec happily and Underhill snorted. “What?” asked Alec offended. “I’m Magnus’ angel, it’s the truth,” he then added and looked at Magnus, looking all smitten. “Right?” he asked, his puppy eyes begging Magnus to say yes.

“Of course,” said Magnus with a wink.

“An Angel dating the Prince of hell,” hiccupped Alec. “How-how romantic is that?” asked Alec and looked at Magnus. “Someone should write a book about us. Our romance would be a best seller,” he then added and then looked at Theo. “Theo! You can write, you can write about us,” said Alec and Underhill started laughing loudly. “Yes, yes. And then because the book would be a success, we would get our own movie. Oh, maybe a TV show. Imagine, Theo… the possibilities,” said Alec and his eyes lit up.

“Oh, yes, the possibilities are endless,” said Underhill and shook his head, while Magnus was just listening to all of this with amusement on his face. Drunk Alec was hilarious and adorable.

“I wonder who’d play me,” said Alec, who had already decided that there was going to be a movie made about him and Magnus. “Daniel Radcliffe?” asked Alec and started thinking. “No, no. He’s hot but too short,” said Alec and Magnus started laughing. Apparently, Alec was having a casting session right there. “Oh, I know. I vote for Jared Padalecki!” announced Alec. “He’s hot and tall. Like me. Perfect,” said Alec and Magnus burst into loud laughter. “Though-though that hair would have to go,” he said and Underhill looked at Magnus, because he had no idea what who he was talking about. "Then again, the hair is sacred. I'll have long hair in the movie, that would be kind of hot," added Alec.

“A friend of his?” asked Underhill confused.

“No, he’s an-”

“Yes, my friend he is!” announced Alec. “He’ll understand me. Just like me he also has a brother that likes to get himself in trouble. A lot,” said Alec and Magnus was dying with laughter. Alec had all of the things jumbled up. He wasn’t talking about the actor, but about the character he was playing in a TV show he got Alec into a few weeks ago. “He also hunts demons for a living.”

“So, a Shadowhunter?” asked Underhill.

“No, no… a Mundane,” said Alec.

“And he hunts demons?”

“Yes,” said Alec happily. “He’ll play me,” he then added and Magnus was just shaking his head. “You know him too, right, Magnus?”

“Mm-hmm,” said Magnus and shook his head, dying with laughter again.

“You’ll give him a call, right?”

“Yes, yes… first thing tomorrow,” said Magnus, obviously lying and Alec bought it, happy.

“We need to find someone to play Magnus!” said Alec happily and then started thinking. No one that he knew fit Magnus. Magnus was too perfect. “I don’t know who though,” said Alec and then pouted. “I’m so sorry, Magnus,” he then added.

“It’s okay,” said Magnus and then laughed. “You know what, I think Theo was right. You need to get some rest,” he said and Alec gave him an offended look. “You know, so that you can continue with casting and all of that. For our movie,” said Magnus and winked.

“Oh, yeah!” said Alec happily. “You’re right,” he then said and then looked at Theo. “I’ll call you when I find someone to play Magnus. You have the script ready by tomorrow? Okay? Okay!” he then added and made his way to the couch and collapsed on top of it, thinking of someone who was going to star in his movie as Magnus.

“I… he… wow,” said Underhill and Magnus burst in laughter.

“Yeah, I know,” said Magnus and shook his head. “I doubt he’ll remember any of this tomorrow,” he then said and Underhill nodded and shook his head. “Leave him to me, and go home to your man,” he then said and winked.

“Okay,” said Underhill and chuckled. “Tell Alec I’ll work hard on the script,” he then teased and Magnus nodded with a chuckle.

“Deal,” said Magnus and after the two of them said their goodbyes to each other, Magnus made his way to Alec, who was mumbling something to himself, sat down next to him and kissed him softly when Alec cutely blinked up at him. “You’re too adorable, Alexander,” said Magnus and leaned closer to his boyfriend, Alec wrapping his arms around him and pulled him in for another kiss. Magnus’ kisses distracted Alec from his casting process, but he promised himself to get right back to it the next day! His movie was going to be such a success!

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading.  
> Comments and opinions are welcome ~~


End file.
